Who let the cow out!

OK so here is a little rant about breastfeeding so if that bugs you just skip on past this post


I am a cow. There is not any other nice way to describe it. And I feel bad because there are so many people out there who can't produce any/enough milk. I am pumping while at work and going at lunch to feed Hana and I have a freezer full of milk. I gave up after her first month with feeding her when ever she thought she wanted to suck on something. I will say that I am a HUGE proponent of breastfeeding, but seriously, if you read "the womanly art of breastfeeding" and take all those words seriously you are going to be very tired.

My favorite part of the breastfeeding is when people tell me "oh you know if you breastfeed you can't get pregnant" I always laugh. Because if you read the "requirements" for that method it becomes pretty obvious why it seems to work. You have to nurse baby when baby is hungry (duh!) you have to nurse baby when baby wants comfort, you have to nurse baby if baby is seeming to want to suck on something. HORRIBLE mothers will give bottles and pacifiers. YOU MUST LET BABY NURSE to fulfill baby's need of sucking.

Are you seeing something here? If your child is nursing to fulfill all of this, then you likely have a baby on your boob for, like, 37 hours a day. So unless you are really that talented, and not grossed out by your child being part of your "adult time", you are likely NOT having any sex. Or a lot less of it. Thus, as we have learned, abstinence is the best method of birth control. So I don't think that breastfeeding actually prevent pregnancy in any sort of hormonal way, I think it just prevents sex, which prevents pregnancy.

Oh and my other favorite part of the breastfeeding "advice" ....
"you should allow your newborn to nurse to his full contentment. Allow him to remove himself from your breast, but encourage him to nurse at least 20 minutes on each breast, every hour..."

OK, I am not a math major, but that is what, 16 hours a DAY of nursing...

Um, yeah right. I'll stick to the pacifier. She is a fatty, so obviously she gets enough.

I guess the reason I am so annoyed by this is because the first time around I thought that that book was the next best thing to the bible. And I was so tired and sore and frustrated. I did nurse Babyhead #1 for a year, it all worked out, but at the beginning I felt like a fat looser cow that couldn't do what I was "suppose to". No wonder I was worried about my milk supply. NO ONE should be nursing that much. NO baby needs that much. And I felt guilty for NOT doing it, as I think a lot of women do. And a lot of women probably give up because of this bogus advice. There has to be a better way.

(That is NOT medical advice, so please do not take it as such :) )

OK. Stepping off the soap box now...